I brought it on myself. For publishing Al Silver’s latest cartoon, I deserve all the misery I am experiencing.

It seems that “funny, ha ha” is not so funny as I thought. The worst thing about it is that people want it explained. Every comic knows that an explanation of humor is the kiss of death. It wrings the “ha ha” out of a joke as surely as if were delivered by Henry Kissinger. Please don’t ask me why Henry’s telling a joke can’t be funny or you will be delivering another illegal blow to my kidneys.

Humor stands alone or it sits down. And when it sits down, it really sits. Consider this typographical error in the Wall St. Journal. In an article in its business section, instead of “golden share,” the WSJ wrote “golden chair.” Funny ha ha? Maybe, but the Journal apologized and said, “A golden share provision can make it difficult for a company to authorize bankruptcy filings.” So, WSJ said, it is really sorry for the mistake. Of course, the mistake was in explaining, but that’s WSJ for you – not exactly the last remnant of Keynesian/Mort Sahl humor on this third rock from the Sun.

Take two of the funniest jokes of all time….PLEASE. Okay, that’s one, and the other is “Why did the chicken cross the road?” Suppose, after you deliver the punchline, someone says to you, “I don’t get it.” What do you do? You could look at page 997 & 1/2 of The History of Stupidity and Bad Jokes to find the best explanation for the poor devil’s consternation combined with a fine explanation of why the punchline is riotous [it's the 1/2 page on which you find the answer] or you could take The Stupid One out to the back lot and shoot him. DEAD. From the perspective of The Stupid One, the latter is a bit of an uncalled for exaggerated response. From the perspective of what is best for mankind, it is perfect.

What? You still want to know why Pythagoras is perched on a cross? See page 998.

I pause.

Let us now continue.

Then came from the moor under misted cliffs
Grendel marching God’s anger he bore.
The monster intended some one of earthmen
In the hall-building grand to entrap and make way with:
He went under welkin where well he knew of
The wine-joyous building, brilliant with plating,
Gold-hall of earthmen.

Now, this is not a guy to mess around with and, if you do get lucky and whip his behind, his mother will hotly pursue you. I do not know why this comes to mind just because I want to make a few remarks about characters who are not nearly as tough as old monster, Grendel, but I do. So, let us now begin in earnest.

1. According to Ellie Roosevelt, (1960), [remember her? married to the habitual adulterer and would-be U.S. emperor-for-life] Nothing has ever been achieved by the man who says “It can’t be done.” Ellie was a homely bitch who, for that reason alone, should never have been taken too seriously. She thought she had something to do with the founding of the UN – a delusion that was finally matched by Al Gore’s claim to have invented the internet. Let’s waive that and just point out that on this occasion she was just plain wrong. It is not nice to publicly dispute the homilies of great ladies and if I explain why she was a halfwit, I’ll only make you angry.

2. “God’s in his heaven; all’s right with the world.” When Bobby Browning said this, he had forgotten that Eddie Fitzgerald – he of Rubaiyat fame – had already thanked God that Liz Barrett was dead and wouldn’t be bothering us with her stupid poetry any longer. No more Portuguese Sonnets. However, it suddenly occurs to me that Bobby was glad as all getout when his ugly wife, 95 years older than he, kicked the bucket. God was putting the world right, after all.

3. “Ask not what this country can do for you and don’t inquire into whom I am humping.” I like this one. It set a standard for Oval Office conduct that wasn’t to be equaled until Slick Willie came along. The only bad thing I remember for sure about this later event is that Monica refused to bring her dress in for martinizing. The economy still hasn’t recovered.

4. “I am not a crook.” Probably true because my students always assured me that all things are relative. I was never sure what they meant but I think Tricky Dick did what he could to vindicate this profundity.

That’s all for now, folks.

As per usual, this cartoon is the exlusive property of Al Silver and can be reproduced only with his permission.

*****************************
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BfAZQyPcz-I&feature=related
The song is BEYOND THE SEA as sung by Michael Buble.

[The title of this post is created without authorization or even tacit approval of the cartoonist. Neither is the song his idea.